Friday, January 18, 2013

"Ain't nobody got time for dat"

*For constant ideas and ramblings like my facebook profile page!

So I've created a weekly entry called "Ain't nobody got time for dat." I did not come up with that clever saying I am not taking credit. It is simply too awesome to let it go to waste. This weekly entry will consist of me and my boy trying a cool Pinterest thingy we found (that will more than likely have the comment "blah blah now read later you'll be glad you did.") Only true Pinners will get that. I am going to try and prove there IS time for dat and I'm going to share my experience with you. SO if you have any ideas you desperately want to try but are limited on time send em my way! My email is I'm kind of hoping some of them end up on Pintrosity (sp)!

This is not mine. I didn't make it. Ain't nobody got time fo dat.

I've always loved that meme with the lady talking to the news station and she says "Ain't nobody got time for dat." I love it because it is true to a point. That's how we all look at everyday life. We think about exactly how much time we can hit snooze before we will be really late, so late we don't have time to shower. So late we let our child have a soda and (the now extinct) hostess cupcake for breakfast as we speed to drop them off at school. What? Normal parents don't do that? Weird. We do it in other ways as well. We calculate how much time it will take us to scarf down our food so we can rush to the TV set so we don't miss the premier of American Idol. We constantly look at the clock and think about how we can extend the time in the day so we can sit and enjoy doing things as a family. But we never do it. We say we will but instead we find other excuses. Now I want you to think when is the last time you devoted a whole evening to listening and talking with your child. I don't mean telling them to pick up their clothes, finish their peas, brush their teeth, and so on. I don't mean them screaming at you about how unfair your rules are or whining that Jenny's mom lets Jenny wear make-up. No matter the age of your child you can sit and have an enjoyable conversation even if its just sitting quietly coloring the same page in a coloring book. When my boy was acting out during my divorce I discovered the greatest weapon of defense I had was simply dropping to my knees and full body hugging him. He would be in a terrible fit and the moment I embraced him he would melt. It also helped me control my temper. I began talking to my child calmly and at eye level. I began to train myself to listen to him genuinely. I put the cell phone or computer down and truly acknowledged his vocal concern. Not only did this help him communicate better it helped me listen. Now when I pick him up from school the first thing I do when we get in the car is I give him a big smooch and tell him I love him. The radio is off and I don't drive away till he tells me how his day was. I do this everyday.

I know everyone loves the Weds World Wonder night but some of you can't do it on a Wednesday because of other obligations. That is fine! Don't beat yourself up about it you have plenty of other days in the week and opportunities to spend quality time with your kiddos. When I was a little girl probably around the age of 5 I remember my mom waking me up super early on a vacation. We quietly slipped out to the hot tub which is a huge deal for a kid. That was almost 30 years ago and I still remember how that brief moment made me feel so close to my mom. An hour may feel like a minute to an adult but to a child its an eternity. Make that hour count and make it routine. That way they look forward to that day with you every week. Consistency is vital to a childs stability. Do not make false promises or issue bribes to get out of your commitment. They are like elephants and they remember. My son was 2 and I promised to take him to see Elmo live. I took him to Denver instead. He's 6 now. HE STILL REMEMBERS. "Hey mom remember when you promised me Elmo tickets?" or "Hey mom remember that time you didn't take me to see Elmo Live?" See that arrow sticking out of my chest? Yeah thats Elmo Live remorse. I now learned to not make any promises or commitments without ensuring we will definitely be doing it. Freaking kids and their photographic memories. They are worse than a jilted ex girlfriend.

Anyways I felt like rambling. I'm overwhelmed by the positive support so far for this blog! I am truly blessed to have this life. I'm excited for our first Pintertactivity (I made that word up) Good Night!

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